Erm-muh-gersh! I can't believe she's finally complete! I have gobs of behind the scenes pics to share with you but first--- a bit of blog biz.
So, muh blog. I guess a while ago, it broke? Or something? Basically people stopped receiving their email updates and I had no idea. Until someone told me.
The good news-- it's fixed! The bad news-- it ate everyone's subscriptions and I have no way to retrieve them. So, if you don't want to miss any posts, please (pretty please) click the link on the right that says "Subscribe to Suelandia by email".
Thanks. And sorry. Annoying. I know.
I guess I'll start with the video unveiling. It's funny, I meant to talk more about how she changed in my mind before I even began, but once the vid began recording I forgot. The idea of her began as "loss". It's painful, but sometimes when you force yourself to endure it, you come out ahead. Yes we all are forced on some level to deal with it, but we often have a choice to face it or turn away, run from it in our heads, hide.
An example is when I lost my grandma last year. Near the end it became very painful to visit her in the hospice. There was one night she didn't seem happy to see me. She thought she had died, so if I was there, maybe I had too. She was disturbed, not comforted. I thought maybe that would be my last visit. But I forced myself to go again a day later, on my birthday, and she was lucid, and we connected in an extremely meaningful way. She died that night. And I was ready to let her go.
I will always be extremely grateful I forced myself to go see her that day, even though it was difficult emotionally.
So for the sculpture, which is not about her, but just the emotions involved in any kind of loss, I first imagined a much more dynamic pose. She was going to be stepping forward and sort of flinging a bird out away from her. Take that, loss.
This is my approach to any problem-- I want to be DOING something about it. Active response, not passive.
Like losing weight-- I'll run and bike like a madwoman, when in reality, I need to be not eating that cookie like a madwoman. But NOT doing something is not as satisfying as doing something, feeling some measure of control, even if that is an illusion.
That's when I realized, the other side of loss, what you get to once you're through the tunnel of pain, is acceptance--- RELEASE. And that isn't something you DO. It's an internal shift that happens inside, a seismic one, but invisible to the naked eye. You usually can't force it to happen, you sort of ~let~ it happen, usually after feeling a bunch of stuff you'd rather not. But once you get there you're sort of invincible, because you've endured. That was what I wanted to depict.
So-- sorry that backstory was a bit long-- here she is:
As promised, here are a bunch of shots of the process. There were many, many times I had to regroup. Her face alone took me weeks because of having to redo lips, eyes, cheekbones, noses, but eventually, she appeared through the not so pretty (at first) chaos.
Here is a video just on making the hands, which a couple people told me would be nearly impossible to do in steel so to not bother trying. Of course, that said, it HAD to happen. It was on.
Please share and link/Pin this post so I can share her with as many people as possible. Anyone can see her in person for the month of June when my show opens in Hudson WI at Season's On St. Croix Gallery 6/6.
Of course I have no control over who buys her, but she has such a peaceful, even healing vibe. It would be super cool to see her in a public setting like a hospital or cancer center or somewhere many people could enjoy her. She will be a tough one to let go of.